What Ho, and what fettle?

Here you are again, right on time, ready, I hope, for a fix of nonsense loosely relating to an acoustic music theme.

Mind you, it is pretty loosely; Folk Clubs get mentioned.

Be Welcome, Gentle Reader and read on…


Last week I mentioned something of a debate occasioned by a Facebook comment we received to the effect that we should do less Care Homes and therefore as a direct consequence we would do more Folk Clubs.

Not only did I not entirely agree, but, it seems many of you didn’t either, judging by the emails, texts and personal messages received. Interesting.

Moving on.


This week has been the usual mixture of admim, promo, performance and socialising that is quite nice thank you. The number of shows we have coming up is generating a lot of requests for posters, flyers and images. One hall is making a big banner to put up outside.

I hope it doesn’t frighten the horses.

We’ve visited a lot of organisations to talk about shows coming up, as well as tout for business. A Care Home show that was lovely midweek was followed by a show at Burnopfield Community Centre on Saturday night. 50 something souls turned out and the old school hall proved a great place to try out the new Alto 210 PA system. I was very pleased with it (although I might need to turn it down), it hoyed sound right to the back in brilliant clarity; dead chuffed. The night went well, and as the Wrinkly Wroadies came along for the free wine, there are some pictures somewhere. Gentle Readers will be pleased to know that the worry about the Wrinkly Wroadies drinking problem has gone away, as now they don’t worry about it.

Our thanks to Betty and the clan at Burnopfield for a great welcome and a really good evening down the Waters of Tyme.

The new CD is finished, mastered and ready for duplication. Seven tracks, all of them new to vinyl under the FG banner will be offered for sale to an unsuspecting public.

On the social front, we were pleased to welcome jiva torchbearer Val and her minders Jim and Allyson Wigfield for a convivial evening of taking the mick, good grub, wine and casual banter. Good to see one and all, and very pleasing to report that the Valster is still playing, extending her repertoire and intending to get back out there soon.

Jim is still writing and I know where he should head next…


As spring begins to sprung, a young man’s thoughts turn to fancy.

Fancy what, is of course, a matter of purely personal preference, and in enlightened times such as these it is improper to criticize others simply because the object of their affection seems to sport an unusually large number of legs.

However, this is a family show, and nonesuch nonsense will here be permitted.

But a different sort of nonsense certainly will as I bring you the story of Spring at The King’s Head and Washerwoman’s Legs Folk Club.

Yes, I am glad to report that the bastion of traditional Folk Clubs is still running under the benign tutelage of Chairman Dave himself.

As spring has begun to rear its head and the sky is brightening to the East, Dave has decided to spruce things up at the club.

This will begin with himself and be followed by the ashtrays[1].

Dave has had a rummage down the bottom of the washbasket and found his bestest cheesecloth smock. It reaches to his knees and in decoration is a cross between a deckchair and Corporation Tea Towel. It is only slightly stained.

Beneath the cheesecloth parachute, he sports his summer corduroy and the obligatory Jesus sandals[2]. Over the top is the leather waistcoat (of course). What with the sandals, smock and waistcoat; together with the famous Chairman Dave beard, the ensemble reminds one of a slightly mad musical mujahedeen.

The whole effect is topped off (literally) with the black leather Stetson, complete with new feather and a couple of new badges. It is hard to see, but one of the badges looks like the Tufty Club.

Thus attired, Chairman Dave will lead the club to triumph in the new season. He will embrace the fresh wind of change sweeping the Folk movement and lift his eyes to the horizon and try new, challenging and fresh ideas.

First of these is to have theme nights.

The themes have all yet to be settled, but the first three will be:

  • Songs from the Firkin Fettlers Revolt of 1742
  • Songs relating to the Dripping Wranglers opposition to mechanization (it was a blender), and
  • Unaccompanied songs from the Great Cordwainers Bung Hole Drillers March of 1816, when barrel makers and their apprentices marched on the Town Hall to demand the lifting of the Bung Hole and Firkin Stopper tax. This caused a riot, as you might imagine, and several songs were unfortunately written.

The second groundbreaking idea occurring to Chairman Dave, and then the committee, is to have a gala evening. The main one slated for later in the year[3] is the English Melodeon evening, where melodeon plungers will be invited from near and far. They will all sit round in a circle (no other shape is recognised by Folk Clubs) and a prize will be given to the one who looks the most bl**dy miserable.


And so as the last Melodeon left alive squeaks it’s final gasp at the sky, the audience as one heave a sigh of relief and remove their heads from the ashtrays and head off into a brand new Century. In this case, it’s the 18th.


Until Next Time, Acoustic Chums,

Keep Strummin’



[1] The fact that there are ashtrays should tell you something. I told you it was traditional.

[2] However, biblical historians dispute that the Lord ever shopped at Marks and Spencer.

[3] Obviously with Melodeon players being what they are, it can’t be that much later.


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